You know when you have a lot of stuff on your plate, you really don't want any extra added. I particularly don't care for having petty things added. Apparently, in the company of my step-mother, I am not referring to her properly in front of Jasmine. I guess refraining from calling her an idiot isn't enough. (and many worse but we won't go there right now) I've tried to remain pleasant over the years that they've been together. I've done a damn good job. I can't help it if it's not easy for me to refer to her as anything other than by her first name to my daughter. Jasmine calls her what they've asked her to and that should be enough. I'm to the point that I'm sick of bending over backwards to appease people over stupid things. I include my step mother in every single conversation that I have over there and if nothing else, I end up talking to her more than my dad in an effort to not appear like a total bitch. I keep repeating to myself, I will not reply to that email while I'm pissed, I will not reply to that email while I'm pissed. It would be all too easy for the resentment from my entire life to come pouring out right now if I were to go there. My feelings on most issues are rarely considered and yet I have to be extremely sensitive to the feelings and emotions of others? Particularly those I don't really care for all that much? I won't say my dad hasn't made any effort the last four or five years but don't expect miracles from someone who is already stretched thin. It's not like I asked to be put in the positions I'm in. Those that were forced upon me. If he doesn't like what I call her to her face then it's a damn good thing he can't be a fly on the wall at my house. (apparently referring to her as a SHE or a HER is demeaning in some way... I'll have to ask my husband how inappropriately I'm behaving around them. He always gives me an honest answer) I had a really good day until I got that. Do you ever see an email in the inbox and just KNOW you're not going to like what it says?
Let's get to the nicer parts of my day for now. I only got a few hours of sleep due to some awful restless leg syndrome that is being worsened by pregnancy. You'd think I'd be in a bad mood but I actually wasn't. (lack of sleep is not attractive on me, at all) I actually, get this, played video games for quite a while today. You know when the last time I played a video game was? Sometime around last Christmas. I've never used the PS3 and it took some getting used to. Hell, I'm still getting used to it. Apparently, at some points in the game, if you move the controller, even a little, you player moves. Holy hell do I suck at those parts in the game. My husband thought it was pretty funny. Afterwards, we ate dinner and Jasmine ate quite a bit for once. Then, since I had so much energy I thought I'd better use it in a productive way instead of playing a game. I started to clean the living room and I mean REALLY clean. Every corner has been picked up, swept and mopped. Every year I have to move our couch for the Christmas tree so I got that out of the way early. (although I hate where it has to go... there's not a lot of options however) The only thing out of place is the large mound of toys in one corner. Hopefully, we can tackle at least some of the spare bedroom to move those into this weekend. We're planning on making it a room for Jasmine. That way she has her own personal space where the baby can't go, unless she wants it there. She'll have a dvd player in there, bed, her toys and whatnot. I wish I could blame the lack of work being done in that room on my husband but I've been putting it off just as much as he has. It's mostly a lot of clothes to fold and decide where to put them. I told my husband after I finished the living room, I would stop as I knew I was coming up on my limit before my back started to protest but I threw in some dishes in the dishwasher and threw my clothes in the dryer before coming to bed. At least I didn't go too far overboard after that, clothes and dishes don't weigh too much. ;) Now that the living room is moved around, my cats are upset with me. Cats are not big fans of change for the most part and my flame point siamese definitely prefers things to stay the same. Now he has to find a new favorite spot to sleep. You see, even though the same furniture is in the room, it's in different places now. Can't you see the dilemma??
3 years ago