Playing Catch Up not to be confused with Ketchup

I've been super tired lately. Shawn has been sick for, jeez, I lost count how many days now. Around a week and a half I want to say. Fever, chills, face hurts, coughing, etc. I finally got him to go to the doctor yesterday. He doesn't seem to know what's going on so he just gave him antibiotics. He's needed a tooth pulled for two weeks now and suddenly decided this morning would be a good time to do that. You know, since he's already in so much misery, why not add to it? I've gotten very little in the way of time off from kids since he got sick. I'm doing my best to be understanding but I want to kick the crap out of his white blood cells, guide them in the right direction and get this over with!

I found out a few days ago that when Shawn took my cat to the vet, the vet told him not to expect him to live more than ten days. He didn't tell me that because he didn't want me to freak out. I get not telling me the first or second day (I was already a bit upset at the thought of him dying) but I would've liked to know that I may not have very much time left at all with him. He's been holding steady since that vet appointment, up until the last few days. His eyes are weepy again and he seems to be sleeping more. Still eating and drinking though and Jasmine said he tried to dart into the kitchen before she could close the door so that's a good sign. He goes back for more blood tests in a week.

Next week I'll be fostering a dog. I know, I didn't think I'd do ANY dogs for a long time. However, we ran into some issues at the rescue. We took in several border collie's from a puppy mill seizure and then there were, I believe, 35 dogs seized from the next county over. The shelter they were taken to is a kill shelter and is one of the ones we deal most closely with. When they called to ask if we could lighten their current load a bit, we agreed, knowing if we didn't, they would surely be up for euthanasia. (the 35 cannot be adopted out until they are given over or the court gives them over so for now, they are taking up space) We are taking one of the border collies. I really don't have much information on her other than she hasn't went potty in her crate in the last two days. :) And she's very submissive. I don't have any dogs that are overly aggressive but if another dog shows a lot of dominance, Cash gets a little pissy. We haven't had a dog in about a year now so I'm a little nervous at my own dogs reactions. I'll just do it like I always do, toss them out the backdoor and hope for the best. (we do it one at a time, not the whole pack at once) I'm not sure of the conditions of the puppy mill that she was kept at or the conditions she was in when she was seized. I may or may not learn more in the next week. They came from TN so we may not actually know a lot. Again, I'm nervous but getting excited about it as well. I love the herding breeds and this is only the second herder I have gotten to foster and we had the last one such a short time, maybe a few days.

I've been playing phone tag with my OB the last few days. As I stated before, I suddenly had bleeding and some other things that concerned me. Quite frankly, I thought I was having a miscarriage. I thought on the IUD that would be extremely rare but after doing some research, I found that it does happen and usually the first year of the placement. The doctor doesn't seem too concerned, had me take a pregnancy test, which was negative (at home) and told me to call back if things don't improve. If something like this happens again, I think I'll have it removed. I don't want to think I may keep getting pregnant and then having miscarried because of this thing. I don't want to have another baby for a while but I would rather have it go to term than have that happen. I still need to make an appointment for my psoriasis but this took precedent (did I use that correctly?) for the moment.

The three kittens we have right now are doing fabulously. Although I was bitten by Mango earlier tonight. I washed and washed and then washed again. I know what those infections feel like and I'd like to avoid it if at all possible. We're still working on getting him used to dogs and stupid me was holding him when Savannah walked by. Savannah is now scarred for life. (mentally not physically) She thinks kittens came straight from hell to hiss, spit and claw at her. She seems to think adult cats are completely unrelated to the smaller things from hell. The other two kittens pretty much act as if dogs do not exist and would gladly walk over top of them, rather than around. Typical cat.

Odds, ends and the like

Here I thought I was falling into a depression again. Nope. I was pmsing. Why didn't I realize that? Because I haven't had a period since July. Now suddenly they're back. I don't know if that's normal but since I need an appointment with my OB soon anyway, I might as well ask if the IUD needs to be checked. I know it's still in there because I can feel it when the screamer jumps on my stomach.

I also need to see about my psoriasis. I've had a spot of it since the end of my pregnancy with Jasmine, on my ankle. It's noticeable enough that I've had people ask me about it but it isn't spreading, nor has it bothered me so I've just kind of stopped with any creams. That is until recently. It's spread to my chest and I'd like to, you know, not have it do that. I'm going to try and get my doctor to refer me to a dermatologist since when I showed him the spot on my ankle he was kind of 'I guess that's what it could be.' I don't care for that answer anymore. I want someone to say, here is the expensive cream that will erase it.

Allergies have been out of control. Jasmine wakes up every day sniffling and sneezing. She then spends the day that way. I have been on and off throughout the days. I'll sneeze nonstop for ten minutes and then be good for a few hours. Allergy medicine is kicking my ass though. I take it, fall asleep, wake up, take some more, fall asleep. I usually have a prescription for some stuff but I didn't think I needed it anymore since I've been good up until recently. Dummy.

Shawn spent the last couple of days in bed with a 103 fever. I've been without my helper. :( Of course, the kids choose the worst days to act like monsters from hell. My day was spent stop doing that, stop doing that, stopdoingthat, stopdoingthat, STOP DOING THAT!!!!!

Evan has two bottom teeth and keeps biting himself, which ends with him sobbing. It happens a good ten thousand times a day. Give him a cookie and you're guaranteed to see him bite down on at least one finger. Sometimes he doesn't even have food in his mouth. He just bites down and hurts his gums on the top half of his mouth. I've muttered under my breath 'baby's are stupid' a good dozen times in the past two days. If you gnaw on your hand and it hurts, stop doing it. I'm just sayin'.

And the vet massively screwed up the neuter on one of my fosters. I've seen this procedure done dozens of times. I honestly think I could DO this myself. And yet the new vet managed to cut the wrong wire. I'm glad she's not on the bomb squad. Kitty was in the hospital for I think five days and nights and seems to have come quite close to dying. (I don't know as I wasn't the one to speak to the vet, the other foster handled it) He is out now but will not be coming back with us as he has several adopters interested in him. We will be getting several of them back for a time.

Grandpa

As a kid, I would follow you from room to room. I didn't do it intentionally. I would be playing, look up and no one would be around, so I'd find you, sit down and start playing some more. Eventually, I'd look up and no one would be around, so I'd find you again. You weren't avoiding me, you just had things to do that didn't require sitting around while I played at your feet. On the rare occasions you were sitting (nascar is on or football but usually it was for nascar), I would sit in front of your chair but not in front of the tv and either keep myself busy playing quietly or watch as you blew smoke rings to the ceiling. (back before you quit) When it was warm outside, you would sit in one of the chairs with the radio on, a dog at your feet and I would run around the yard. There was never much in the way of speaking, unless you were singing along to the radio or asking me if I wanted some chocolate covered caterpillars, crickets or ants, and we liked it that way. At night, we were always the last to sleep. You would sit down in one of the recliners (which I now own and plan to reupholster) and I would sit on the my bed made of egg cartons. Grandma had bought proper beds but us kids always preferred to sleep on the floor in the living room. You would usually watch the country music channel or an old John Wayne movie. The line dancing I could've done without but I did enjoy watching the duke. Late into the night, you would give in and go to bed, giving me access to the remote control. I would spend hours watching Golden Girls or I Love Lucy. The next morning you'd barely be able to finish your coffee before I'd be awake and back at it. There was only one time I can ever remember you getting stern with me my entire life and I deserved it. I was four or five, testing the limits of your patience. We, you, grandma and myself were watching tv and I was crawling through the drapes. No matter how many times you asked me to stop, I would just continue on when I thought you'd stopped paying attention. I would've gone after me a long time before you did. As I grew older, the only thing that changed was that I didn't play anymore but I still wasn't usually more than a room away from you. I can only imagine what you were thinking all those years. 'Damn kid won't give me two seconds of peace.' I always wanted the man that I married to have the same sense of values that you did. And when you met Shawn and instantly had a bond, I knew I was doing ok.

During those teenage years, I did things that I shouldn't have and all along worried that you would find out and it would disappoint you. Even though you had been a smoker, I never wanted you to know I was one, although I think you had a pretty good idea. I wanted you to be proud of the person I was becoming. After all, as a child, you were a god to me, infallible and infinite. All it would've taken to get me to stop doing anything at all, would've been a look of disapproval from you.

After Jasmine was born, I was intrigued by the attachment she had to you. The bond that you shared was immediate and binding. You were two kindred souls. There was not much communication on her part, other than smiling every time she saw you or heard you voice in another room and yet there was a perfect understanding that you were the same. She, too, would've followed you from room to room. The only difference is, I don't think she would have the ability to keep as quiet.

All those years you were the strongest person I knew. You could do work that it would take several men hours of work to accomplish. The only time I think you looked back and thought maybe you should've had someone else do a job, was when you were pulling that old post out of the ground for my mom. You remember, the post that went through the back window of the truck that you were sitting in. It probably damn near scared the shit out of you but hearing my mom's voice full of panic caused you to laugh. I'm sure she thought she'd need an ambulance for you and here you were laughing at her. It wasn't long after that however, that you were putting up the wood fence there. You were down to the gate that had been giving you all some trouble. I was on the deck and our eyes met. It's one of the few times I could truly tell you were in pain. It must have been something awful too because you never left a job unfinished.

It seems like months later that they finally sent you in for xrays and found the mass growing in your lung. Then, everything moved in fast forward. It didn't seem like we had a chance to catch our breath before we were in the hospital, waiting for you to come out of surgery. Mom and I, met you and grandma at the hospital to be checked in. They let us see you after you'd gotten some of the medication to relax you. They were signing forms and you told me to take a flower. I looked puzzled for a moment before I realized you were a bit high and thought that the flowers attached to the pen were real. I don't remember if I'd slept that night or not. The waiting makes you sick. You want to shake someone and ask them what the hell is going on. Our family took up a good portion of that little waiting room. I'm sure they were relieved when we were told you were in recovery and we could all go back and see you. I thought I could be strong enough but when I saw the tubs coming out of your chest and all the wires attached, I felt sick and knew if I didn't leave the room immediately, I was going to pass out. The nurse asked a family to move off the couch so I could lay down for a few minutes. The elderly gentleman said he understood as his granddaughter had the same reaction upon seeing his wife in recovery.

We all walked on egg shells for quite some time after your surgery. You healed, slowly. We were worried that every scan would show it was back or had spread. You did too. You were convinced it had come back. And eventually, you were right. Only it had nothing to do with the cancer that had been in your lungs. This was a whole other monster, one that couldn't be removed with a scalpel. This one was living in your blood. The doctors put you on a new type of chemo that you could take in pill form. We thought we had plenty of time before the cancer would take it's toll. I had just seen you a day or two prior. My mom took a day off work just for the hell of it, when the phone rang. The caller id said it was from the hospital. I answered it. Grandma was on the other end and I knew immediately, it was bad. We were dressed, ready to go and to the hospital quite quickly, looking back but at the time I worried that we weren't driving fast enough. You were still in the ER when we got there. Grandma had calmed down a little. You were having trouble breathing to the point that she called an ambulance. You had pneumonia but waited till there was no stopping it to rear it's ugly head. I didn't leave the room to hear what the doctors had to say. I didn't want to hear them if it meant it couldn't be said in the room. Eventually, they moved you up to the cancer ward. I thought you were doing better. I didn't want to see the truth. I even tracked down your nurse when I went to get a pop and asked her if you didn't have the DNR, if there would be some way to remove the excess fluid from your lungs. Yes, I would've tried to go against your wishes if it meant saving your life. I just couldn't stand the thought that something completely treatable would be the thing to snuff out the brightest candle to ever burn. When it happened, I felt like they were going to have to drag me from the room. The nurses wanted to make the room more presentable for family that was yet to come. I, on the other hand, felt like if I let go of you, it was really over. If I let go of your hand, the connection would be broken, I would be broken. A part of me would be taken and I would no longer be whole. If it had been a nurse to pull me off of you and not my mom, I would've hit them. I don't doubt that for a second. I wasn't ready. But I never would've been ready. The only sound I could hear were my mom's voice and my soul being torn apart. Jasmine had been silent the entire time. She sat in her car seat for at least an hour. Within a minute of your passing, she was inconsolable. It got so bad that I had Shawn take her to his mom's house for a few hours. But not before I let her sit on the bed next to you and touch your hand. It was the only time she stopped crying. She was only four months old.

I would never have been anywhere different than by your side that day. I know some people would never watch their loved ones pass away. For me, there wasn't a question. There was nothing anyone could've offered me to have taken me away from that hospital that day. That piece is still missing but I feel you around me. When grandma broke her arm on Christmas day a few years ago, we talked about the jokes you would've made, once you knew she was going to be ok and was fully doped up on pain killers of course. I say melonwater now instead of watermelon. I can only imagine how mad grandma was when she realized that's why my aunt didn't know what a watermelon was. Someday, I'll eat a twix and ask my kids if they want a chocolate covered caterpillar. I'll bit into it and say "See, it's still fresh and chewy on the inside." I don't think any of us kids took any candy you ever offered us. Too afraid it would actually be made of bugs.

I will always carry me with you but I can never get that piece back. After a while, crocodile.

I have a post in mind for today but I just don't have it in me tonight to do it. My head hurts and I don't want to sit here and cry, making it worse. Today, (20th) Evan is 8 months old. Also today, my grandfather passed away four years ago. This has been, for me, the worst year with him gone. After awhile, Crocodile.

I know, I'm rambling

I don't know exactly what is going on with me lately. I'm exhausted, depressed, angry... just about every not good emotion you could want to have. I'm not sure if I've been taking my anti-depressants regularly. It's not unusual for me to miss one or two a week as kind of a way to make them last longer. Missing two in a week wouldn't cause me any problems but more than that might. In all honesty, it's probably been coming all along and I've just been in denial about it somewhat. I figured I could handle all the stress and weather the storm a little better than I would've in the past. And I suppose I am, better than back then. I just thought I could avoid this feeling all together. I need to de-stress and I don't know how. Really, I don't know what helps me feel less stressed out. When I lived at my mom's, I would sit outside for a while and just listen to the birds. Can't do that now because one kid will want me or my husband will have had enough of the screamer. I think a great deal of my headaches the last two months have been due to stress. You can only blame your sinuses for so long before you have to realize it's something else. Some days the kids seem to make everything a thousand times worse, other days, they're the only thing that keeps me from banging my head into a wall repeatedly. Jasmine knows just the right things to say some days and Evan knows just when to smile out of no where. And I know a part of it is the time of year. A very big part of it this year more than the others for some reason. We tried leaving the kids with my mom for a few hours, thinking it would help me. But it really didn't. I felt the same way with them here as I did without them here. Although, at times, it's nice to only have one of them with me at a time. Like today. I just took Jazz and we went shopping with my mom. Yes, the same woman who sliced up her tendon with a nail is now out shopping. Granted, there was a lot of limping involved but she was out. Now come to think of it, I felt pretty decent most of today till I had to come back home. It's not home that is a problem, it's reality, I think. When I'm here, reality is right. in. my. face. When I'm out, my mind can wander to cute clothes or sweet animals. Hopefully, once we're past this weekend, things will start to feel better. The sooner it's over with, the sooner I can dread it for next year. But at least for this year, it will be over. And then again, maybe I'll take up a Xanax habit. That's a joke by the way. No interventions necessary. I promise, less whining in the future but this weekend there are special circumstances.

People love me so much they give me stuff

The really nice people at The Green Bottle have agreed to donate two of their bottles to our rescue organization. This is the first time I've convinced someone to give us something for free. I'm not comfortable with asking most of the time. However, they have it on their website that if you are a non-profit and would like a bottle from them, then plead your case and they will consider it. I really like this company. I haven't gotten a bottle from them yet but plan on doing so in the future. They come in a variety of colors and designs. Yah! http://www.greenbottleonline.com/about.html

We were running out to get pizza tonight and I was letting Rocky back in the house before we left. Somehow (I wasn't paying attention and I'm naturally accident prone) the bottom of the storm door got caught on my heel, digging into my achilies and taking some flesh with it. My achilies is something I'm weird about. I don't like it touched by anyone. If Shawn is rubbing my feet, he knows to stay away from that area or I will freak out. I'm not sure when it started or why. For whatever reason, Shawn decided he needed to come back into the house - Oh he forgot his keys - and I was gripping the door and making an exaggrated amount of noise. (typical for me when I'm in pain) About an hour later I was able to look at it. I can't tell how deep it is as everytime I move my foot, it starts to bleed. At least I'm no longer whimpering. :) The only way I know it would've hurt anyone, not just me, was I immediately felt like throwing up. Mean old door.

Shpeel

Six kitties are getting neutered and one is getting spayed tomorrow. I'm sure they'll enjoy that. It's weird not having them around tonight. No one to chew on my toes or try to jump me from around the corner. I'm looking forward to making my kitten cage super awesome, fantastic. :)

In November, one of the Cirque shows (a brand new one!) is coming to Chicago. It'll be there till middle of January. My husband has gotten to do a ton of boy stuff these last few weeks, which will be continuing on through next year since he has Bulls tickets. When he bought Cubs tickets a few weeks ago I told him if there were any shows I wanted to see, I was going and he was taking me. Barring any major expenses coming up between now and the end of October (when we'll have the money to go) I should be going to see my first Cirque show! I want to take Jasmine as well because I think she'll love it as she likes to watch the shows on tv. I need to find someone to watch Evan for the day. Hoping my mommy dearest will step up to that one because my other "usual" sitter and I aren't on the happiest of terms and I think it's going to get worse in the coming months before it gets better. They are saying this is going to be different from any Cirque show that has been done before. Different than any show from any theatre group ever. They're being purposely vague about details. You can see little snippets and you know there are tap dancers, hip hop dancers, clowns and a story line but there's no defining line as to what exactly the show entails. It is called Banana Shpeel: A new twist on Vaudeville. It's supposed to be a mix of a lot of the old styles of dance and theatre mixed in with modern. It's so new and never been done before that they are making up dance steps as they go. I believe it will be different from most other Cirque shows in the respect that there's not going to be a lot of the acrobatics that you associate with Cirque. Which is the only reason I would be hesitant to take Jasmine as I know the acrobatics are something that would keep her focus and attention for most, if not all of the show. I would like to make a day of it. We don't go up to Chicago often. (I would like to go more) There are so many places and shops that I haven't seen and foods to try. I'd like to eat before the show, have a nice fat, full tummy and sit down to watch. Anyone have any good restaurant suggestions?

Blood, herpes and nails... not in that order

My poor mom had a hell of a weekend. Saturday, she was tearing up carpet in one of the upstairs rooms with a box cutter. She was doing small sections at a time 'cuz, you know, that shit's heavy. At one point, the box cutter slipped and sliced up her arm. (I forgot to look at the damage today and scold her) It sounds like it was a pretty nasty cut and she probably should've went to see if it needed stitches but the women of our family come from a very stubborn stock. We'd just as soon have a scar, be in a little pain than take our asses to a hospital, sit in a waiting room full of sick and/or crazy people and finally, after four hours of sitting with said crazy people, you get taken back for a five minute stitch and a band aid. Onto Sunday, she was out getting ready to feed the horses or do something with those big knuckle headed animals, when she stepped on a board. On top of the board was some shingles. Sticking out of the board was a nail. A sharp, pissed off nail. He went straight through my mom's foot to the point that you can actually see where it touched the skin on the top half. And yes, she had shoes on. It's a good thing the shingles were sitting on the board or else she would've had to pull the nail and board off her foot. The shingles weighed everything down and when she lifted her foot to continue her step, the nail came out. It still gives me the heeby jeebies just thinking about it. She goes to Medpoint, as it was a Sunday and like I said before, we don't like the ER. Unfortunately, it sounds like she got a doctor who had just plain had enough that weekend. He didn't do anything for her or give her anything. Not even a Tylenol 3 for shit's sake. I bitched about that point more than she did. She thought she might be able to force herself to go into work today... with no pain medication... with a hole in her foot. Yeah we were donkeys in a past life. However, when she woke up for work at 3am, it became immediately evident that there would be no work. My brother actually had to carry her back to bed after she called in sick. She made an appointment at our regular doctor's office where they actually took some time to look at her foot. She had xrays and a note saying no more work for a week. They gave her a tetanus shot (or was that at Medpoint? I don't remember), antibiotics (which was a damn good thing because she's running a fever now) and enough vicodin to make a junkie cry tears of joy. Turns out she nicked a tendon when the nail went in, which is why moving her toes in any way at all is terribly painful. I figure while she's off work we'll take up jogging, go shopping and do some step aerobics.

I stopped and picked up a cat cage from another foster today for when we have showings. You should never, ever tell me I can't or shouldn't do something by myself. I will nod my head and agree but the second I'm out of sight, I will do it on my own. (did I mention I come from stubborn women?) We didn't have time to set up the cage when we got home. And then Shawn went to bed. The cage was not up and I hate leaving things undone. Even though I was told that it was a two person job, I went ahead and tried to set it up myself. I have a blood blister but it's up. Take THAT cat cage!

Evan over the last week or so has decided he will not go to bed unless he is sitting up. You know, god forbid he miss me typing some boring shit on here. As soon as he could sit up really well, he decided that sleeping was for cats, not babies. Every night is a fight to get him to sleep. I want to lay him down, have him fall asleep and be done with it. He wants to sit up until his eyes can't stay open any longer. However, he's on the verge of crawling (he can caterpillar it pretty far as of today) therefore, I have to keep him on my lap or risk him wiggling right onto the floor. Which means, every other word I type comes out like t/zh/is and I have to backspace, pull his hands off the keys and take a deep breath to keep from duct taping his hands together, then to his torso. Someone explain to me why my maternal clock says 'Hey why not have another one in a year or two?! It'll be FUN." Fun like what? Herpes? Jock itch? Seriously how effed is my clock??

Sweet smells

The last few day have been full of nice smells in my house. Last night I made homemade soft pretzels. (first time ever cooking something bread-like) They were fantastic. I will definitely make them again... on a special occasion. The dough needed to be kneaded for quite a while. I've never kneaded bread. It's haaaaard. :) My arms, back, legs and neck all hurt afterwards. (I set the bowl on a bench and was bent over... gave me more momentum but caused the achies) It took about three hours all together. Knead dough, allow dough to rise one rough, roll out half of dough, make into pretzels, dip into stuff, allow rise 15 more minutes and then finally, cook for 5-8. The only change I will make the next time is that I will not roll into pretzels. Rolling dough out like this takes a great deal of time and effort. After you *finally* get the dough rolled out into a pencil thin line, you have to make it into a pretzel shape, dunk it in a baking soda/water solution and then put aside for a while. I cannot count the amount of pretzels that stretched and snapped after putting them in the baking soda/water. The curse words were flying. I made three perfect pretzels... out of 12. And those three? I didn't think to grease the pan and they stuck to it, till the next day. Yeah, laugh it up. I ended up cutting them into one inch pieces and they were perfect for dipping that way.

Tonight I made spice cake with vanilla icing. It turned out well and I was surprised that Jasmine likes it. Typically, you give the kid a piece of cake and she'll eat all the pieces with frosting and toss the rest. She actually ate all of the piece of spice cake I gave her. I was more interested in frosting the cake. I have only gotten to use my new icing tools for cupcakes. The cake told me... I need practice. haha As I've said before, I do not have steady hands, thus my piping skills are lacking. It might have looked better if there had been an earthquake at the same time. Even out my own shakiness a little. :)

Thank you for the well wishes for Isaiah. It'll be a few more days before we notice any real sign of improvement if the prednisone is working but he seems a little more bright eyed today. That could just be wishful thinking on my part however.

My Kitty

My flame point siamese, Isaiah has been slowly losing weight over the last few months. I tried worming him, I tried antibiotics, different food, anything I could before I had to take him into the vet. I think I put it off because I just knew it would be bad news. I, however, was expecting cancer, not an autoimmune disease. They did quite a few tests (all of which I knew they would do before he was even taken up there) before telling my husband it was one of two autoimmune diseases, aplastic anemia or immune mediated hemolytic anemia. With the aplastic anemia, his bone marrow stops making red blood cells over time, eventually completely. Your red blood cells carry oxygen needed to keep your organs alive, without them, your organs are deprived of oxygen and die. The only way to be certain he has aplastic is to do a bone marrow aspirate. There's no treatment if he has it and he would slowly fade away and die. The vet (my favorite at this clinic) said that doing the test would be cruel as it's extremely painful and wouldn't give us any results other than ruling it out if that's not what it is. The immune mediated hemolytic anemia is when your bodies white blood cells attack the red blood cells. They see the red blood cells as the enemy or a foreign invader in your body and try to kill them all off. There is treatment with this kind of anemia but he still has a 50/50 chance of dying. Right now he is on Prednisone and a high calorie diet as well as a high calorie gel. (he's not happy about any of this except for the diet which means loads of canned food) After 30 days, he will be seen by the vet again. If he hasn't improved at all, they will assume it is aplastic but if he's showing signs of gaining weight and becoming more active, he will be kept on the Prednisone for the rest of his life. I'm still learning about both of these kinds of anemia therefore, I feel a little... ignorant I suppose. Typically, I can walk into a vet's office, be told a diagnosis and immediately have a strong idea of what happens, the tests given, possible treatments, etc., so I feel a little out of sorts. However, the more I'm learning, the more discouraged I am becoming.

Chicken Little

Just made friends with a weird little bug. I decided to befriend him rather than torture him mercilessly (because, you know, I torture all living things for fun, right) as he looked kind of out of this world. I believe him to be from another planet. I figured if I was kind to him, he would spare our planet from destruction. See, I just saved the world. You should all be eternally grateful. Maybe even buy me presents. Or another crack rock for Mary Poppins. She's withdrawing at the moment and pissing me off. (facebookers inside joke-ish) At any rate, he was rather interesting looking. Flat as a piece of paper and fast as fire next to gasoline. I allowed him to crawl (or run) on me for a while as I tried to figure out exactly what the hell it was and then, once I gave up, I let him go. (back to his spaceship that is... because he's an alien... he told me himself)

Drop off momma cat tomorrow so that she can get her spay on. (harhar, I'm just full of it tonight) And pick up a kitten cage for when we have showings as well as some food and litter for the little monsters. We only have one that still hisses on a regular basis when he sees people but as long as you stand still for a second, he unpuffs. He'll need a home that for whatever reason wants a cat they never have to see or pet. Unless they take two at once, then he might come out more often. The rest should adjust pretty easily to whatever home they find. (or don't find since it seems like no one is adopting cats right now) Friday the realtor comes by to take some pictures. She was going to do it today but it was a little rainy out and she wants to take outdoor photos as well so we put it off for a few days. Otherwise a pretty laid back kind of week around here. (shit did I just say that? the sky is going to fall now)

If you are a Halloween fan, http://pfatt.blogspot.com/ is having quite a neat giveaway. I love all holidays but love the whimsy of Halloween. :) Forgive me as I'm not very good at the whole pretty linkage thing. ha

Tesla/Saliva concert and photos

Today we went to a concert benefiting kids with muscular dystrophy after the ABATE motorcycle ride. There was a local band called Os-lo, which we missed almost all of but a few seconds. After they started the show, Saliva came on. They rocked out, however the energy was pretty low on stage I felt. I still enjoyed their set a great deal nonetheless. The main show was Tesla. Wow. Those guys still carry a great deal of energy in their shows and got the crowd nice and riled up. After Signs, my throat started to get a little scratchy. (yes, I'm aware it's not their song - I don't care) I had an absolutely awesome time. I haven't had the greatest luck in the past with concerts and tend to go into them with a glass half empty attitude. Tesla proved you can bring down the house without all the fancy equipment and lights. If the band is into it, the crowd will be into it. My favorite of the songs they did tonight would have to be Love. Even if you weren't a fan of Tesla or that particular song, the energy was just overwhelming.

I took both kids to the event as it was all ages. This was my mom's second Tesla concert. I was always jealous that she'd gotten to go when I was a kid. Jasmine loved it. It was an outdoor concert therefore she was able to run in the grass like a crazy child and scream at the top of her lungs and no one would give a crap. (or hear her for that matter) We were in an area of the grass that didn't have a ton of people so she had plenty of room to roam. Evan... went to sleep. I had Shawn run and buy him earplugs. I was going to bring some but couldn't find them at the house. We gave a pair to another couple with a baby as well. They seemed to be struggling to find a way to keep the noise level down for their little girl. Both my mom and I bought a t-shirt (two for her) and had Frank Hannon, the lead guitarist from Tesla sign them. He is a very nice guy (I can't say that enough, seriously) and seems as down to earth as a rocker can get. At one point he was out watching Saliva along with everyone else. We were the only ones who recognized him or were paying enough attention to see that he was out there. My mom took his picture and shook his hand. It was nice that he didn't seem annoyed by it. (unlike a certain Saliva member who shall go unnamed) And I may have a small crush on him. :) He's hotter in person than any photos out there.

Saliva onstage.

The rhythm guitarist for Saliva, Jonathan Montoya. He looked super high, although it could've been a result of splashing beer over his head repeatedly making his eyes red. I watched an interview with him and he has a surprisingly quiet voice with a slight southern drawl. He's cute when he's not looking psychotic.

Jasmine on daddy's shoulders watching the Saliva set. She's super interested, can't you tell?

Frank Hannon... Swooooon

My mom, Jasmine and myself right after the Saliva set.

Frank on what I believe is a Gibson.

Jasmine and Shawn playing during Tesla. Had to keep her busy somehow.

Jeff Keith, lead singer of Tesla and Frank, again. We were digging the top hat. Must have been annoying him as it didn't stay on longer than two songs.

Daddy and Jazz taking a break from running around.

Jeff Keith again. The guy didn't stop moving the entire show. I swear he possesses more energy than both my kids. He brought a lot of energy to the crowd. And rocked every song from beginning to end.

Evan with his neon pink ear plugs. :)

Jasmine trying to give the peace sign. I keep trying to teach her the horns but for whatever reason, she absolutely, positively refuses to do it.

I know, gasp, another Frank photo. This one is all about the guitar though baby. I loved this doubleneck. I personally don't have long enough arms or fingers to play it but I loved it.

I already plan on going to next year's ABATE concert as long as the bands are someone I know a little. It was a good time for a great cause.

Brain needs foooooood

Over the years, I've always planned on going back to school. After my brief stint at a local animal hospital, I definitely knew that I wanted to learn more and get my BS in veterinary technology. For the last two years, I figured I would go to Brown Mackie College, however, you are not "officially" a veterinary technician through them. You know all the in's and out's but you get paid the same as an assistant. Tonight, while looking for information online to read (why not learn now before I'm in a class?), I found that Purdue has online classes. When I was in high school, I wanted to go to Purdue. In fact, I never even considered what I would do if I wasn't accepted into Purdue. I had no back-up plan, it was Purdue or bust. Then, my teenage angst took over, and I dropped out of school. The idea that I could still get a degree from Purdue is just... there aren't even words. There's a university nearby that I could commute to as well and get an in class experience if I'd rather go that route. Both are very good schools for veterinary science but Purdue is the school. I really can't wait but I know better than to rush it before I have the time (or money) to devote to such a rigorous course. Doesn't stop me from being excited now!

Cookie Jars

I've been working on some writing projects for the shelter, which is why I have been absent a few days. I can't seem to devote myself to a piece that really needs my attention and write something else at the same time. My attention span just doesn't stretch that far.

As some of you are aware (geez I now spend way too much time on Facebook), the other day I wasn't feeling too fabulous. I'm not sure what's going on with my head but I've got it narrowed down to what I think it could be, a sinus infection (although it doesn't really feel like one), the beginning of an ear infection or TMJ. They all produce similar symptoms and my jaw is quite stiff today, which is the only reason I even thought of the TMJ. (which I know I have, however, it only bothers me occasionally) My uvula was swollen something crazy the other day and blood red. The past two days it has been purple, as if blood has pooled at the bottom. It's very strange. If that's still going on by Monday, I'll be calling the doctor man. It's pretty wicked looking at the moment.

I have my hand in quite a few cookie jars right now. It wasn't until recently that I realized, the more projects I'm doing, the more successful I am at finishing them. If I devote all my time to one task, I quickly become bored and scrap whatever I was doing in the first place. When I am doing many different things at once, I find it hard to get bored with them or feel them to be too tedious. I'm working on my cake/cupcake decorating skills and low and behold they are better than I expected. I do not have steady hands. I get asked on a pretty regular basis if I've had coffee because my hands tend to be on the shaky side. Therefore, I figured I would fail miserably at applying icing borders to cakes. On my first attempt, my borders were extremely straight and didn't look very shaky. I want to practice more but I'm not going to buy icing and waste it just so I can make pretty rows of border. I would rather make a cake and have it actually be eaten, except, we've had two birthdays in the last two weeks and we're all a bit caked out. Maybe I'll make one just to send to work with my husband. The vultures will swoop in and eat it before lunch. I'm also working on the memoir that I was talking about the other day. I'm not working in any kind of order (I'm definitely a disorganized mess at times) and just writing down stories of my life as I remember them. I'll work out the details and chronological whatnots later. Then there's the shelter. I'm trying to get more involved than in just fostering, seeing as how I may have to drop that when we move. For right now, I'm doing some writing and occasionally going over some of the legal and informative stuff for new volunteers. Oh and there's that whole selling of the house nonsense. My least favorite of the foods on my plate. All the other stuff is from a five star restaurant and the house is from McDonald's. Blech!

Misadventures in kitty land

Before I forget, the eggs were from Spartan.

While trying to fall asleep around 7am, I kept hearing a ton of noise from the foster room. They're kittens, they play, make noise and break shit. I assumed they were just up to the usual. I kept hearing it but ignored it. I just wanted to go to sleep and was "this" close. Jasmine woke me up around 9am to go to the bathroom and I heard the noise a little bit but not much. I still ignored it. Although I remember thinking it was odd as there isn't that much they could knock off of the shelves. When I woke up in the afternoon, we went straight to my mom's and at that time, the kitty noise was forgotten. Once we got home, I decided to go see what the hell they had been up to and I'll admit, I really didn't want to go in there because then I would have to see the mess they made. Door opens and a herd of kittens rushes out past my feet but there appears to be no major mess. Odd. Then I see a kitty that looks slumped over a parakeet nesting box. I basically think 'That's just great. I have another one die. They're going to think I kill them for fun.' Then he moves. Ok, not dead. What the hell? The little idiot has gotten his head stuck in the hole that the parakeets would enter and exit. The noise I heard all day was him trying to get out. And let me tell you, he was quite stuck. I tried on my own to get him free and then brought him into the kitchen to see if my husband would help. His first question was how attached are you to this box? He breaks all the sides off it so that now the kitty looks like he's ready to be mounted onto the wall. The kitten isn't the easiest to handle. Putting drops in his eyes requires a high pain tolerance. The idea of using some kind of power tool to saw/drill through the wood was... well, I feared the amount of blood loss I would endure. As husband was off to get some tools, I tried one last time to squeeze his head out and voila! He was only a little thirsty/hungry. He was more interested in playing than anything else. Next time, I'll investigate the sounds coming from that room a little sooner. If I'm not too tired. :)